Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties having enough sleep. What are problems caused by lack of sleep? What can be done about this lack of sleep?
Bhargavee Sisodia21 Aug 2024
In the IELTS test, whether you appear for the academic (student) or general training test (professional), you will get two types of writing tasks, Writing Task 1 and Writing Task 2, although the structure and topics may vary. Here we are addressing and focusing on the academic test for students and particularly delve into writing task 2 which involves an essay. Writing task 2 consists of an average of 70% of the total writing score which is why you must sharpen your writing, vocabulary, grammar, and articulation skills.
Marking Criteria For Writing Task 2
Based on the four basic assessment criteria, your writing tasks, including Writing Task 2 will be evaluated. To understand in detail, let us take you through the following aspects:
Task Response and Achievement:
In this parameter, you will be assessed on how you respond to the prompt and incorporate the main ideas. You will address all the components of the question, highlight the issues presented there with relevant ideas, and make sure to provide detailed explanations and appropriate examples. Without deviating from the topic and ideas, write a minimum of 250 words.
Coherence and Cohesion:
When you structure your essay with a minimum of four to five paragraphs, including two to three main body paragraphs, it is considered organized. Each paragraph should focus on a single central idea ensuring clarity, logic, and coherence. Employing a variety of linking words to connect ideas smoothly can be called a cohesive essay.
Lexical Resources:
It depends on how effectively you employ words and phrases, including the accuracy of your vocabulary, spelling, and overall language precision. Utilizing a diverse range of vocabulary to express ideas clearly, choosing appropriate and meaningful words to convey the ideas, using collocations, and avoiding spelling mistakes are things to consider.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy:
When you form sentence structures, the grammatical accuracy, tense usage, and overall control of grammar is tested. Using a diverse range of grammatical structures, including conditionals, perfect tenses, passive voice, and future tenses, correct word order and placements of adjectives and nouns, and verbs and adverbs, punctuation, and mixed sentences are all included here.
IELTS writing sample topic:
Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties having enough sleep. what are problems caused by lack of sleep? what can be done about this lack of sleep?
While planning this essay question, you should first necessarily identify the category under which this question comes. This is done by comprehending and analyzing the instruction words. Here, it is given as ‘What are problems caused by lack of sleep? What can be done about this lack of sleep?’ which suggests that it belongs to a problem solution essay as it is asking about the problems caused by lack of sleep and how the issue can be resolved.
Before we go to the structure of the problem/ solution essay, let us learn how to write the thesis statement.
Structure of a Problem/Solution Essay
Introduction: Paraphrase the question and incorporate the thesis statement.
Main Body Paragraph 1: You can state and describe the problems caused by the given issue.
Main Body Paragraph 2: You can state and write briefly on the solutions.
Main body paragraph (Optional): You can bring light into additional relevant problems and solutions associated with the topic if there are any.
Conclusion: Wrap it up by summarizing everything that has been said.
Sample Answers
Band 6
In our fast-paced society, people are challenge with not getting proper and enough sleep, which is leads to several health issue, along with mental level. This essay examine the negative result of bad sleep on individuals' life and discovering strategies to solve this problem.
Short sleep can lead conditions like obesity, hypertenson, and cardiovascular disease. Moreover lack of sleep, can cause damage to a immune system. In daily life, decreased concentration from not resting long is the cause for less productivity. Long period of less sleep, it impacts the mental health negatively, and give individuals problem like anxiety, depression, and other psychological disorders. When individuals struggle with mental health issues it is common to face challenge as how to manage concentration, personal well-being and relationship.
Practical measure can help fix lack of sleep problems. The government should put rules on the number of hour to work to prevent employees from giving up sleep. It is in the hand of people not use electronic devices such as phones and social media, before sleep as doing so will give better sleep. For obtaining adequate rest setting up of a consistent daily routine is important. On top, the various smartphone applications can help to monitor and manage sleep patterns, which help individuals achieve the required sleep everyday.
At last, when people go through less sleep, it is detriment to their physical, psychological, and personal lives. This can be solve by fixing sleep cycle and spending less screen time. There can be some awareness Campaigns and advertisements regarding how to follow proper sleep pattern.
Views on the essay:
In bold, it represents that coherence and cohesion can be developed by adding linking words, and organized statements. ‘On top’ can be replaced by ‘in addition’, and ‘at last’ by ‘in conclusion’. Italics are used to show inappropriate and incorrect word usage under lexical resources. Both italics and underlined words and phrases exhibit that there are punctuation, tense-based, and plural-noun errors which come under grammatical range and accuracy. However, the essay is logically structured, and the prompt is well understood.
Band 7
It is widely acknowledged that sleep disorders have impactfully led increase across all age groups, which is a alarming concern of society. Various factors resulting in this issue, but implementing a few important strategies could greatly alleviate the problem. In the essay, the following discussion will examine the causes and suggest potential solutions.
Due to sleep deprived, several health issues are found in individual as they do not get good amount of rest after working for the day. When they do not get enough sleep, they tend to develop diminished level of concentration at school or work, high level of fatigue and stress, and lose interest in surroundings. Additionally, insufficient sleep negatively impacts mental health, and people end up isolating from social participation. At the bodily level, it results in headaches, changes in appearnce, eye issues like redness, and many more.
To address sleep problem, there are effective strategy that can be implemented. By incorporating meditation and yoga into routine, the internal core can be made stronger which will help one to remain calm and foster positive think. Reduction in screen time over the phone before sleeping can prevent the mind from getting caught up in topics. It is advisable to have dinner at least four hours before going to bed as gives ample time for good digestion, and ,it does not disturb sleep.
Although sleep deprivation is a major problem in society as it disrupting a person’s life, but less sleep can be fix with the help of a proper lifestyle, including exercise and spending less amounts of time with technology.
Views on the essay:
There could have been better transition devices in use which are highlighted in bold, and it is affecting the cohesiveness, but the coherence is good as there is structure in the whole essay. Under grammatical range and accuracy, there are some major tense-based and punctuation errors which are highlighted in italics and underlined. Regarding lexical resources, those that have been written in italics have spelling errors, lack in use of synonyms, missing determiners, and incorrect words that makes the essay a 7 band level.
Band 9
In our fast-paced society, it has become an incontrovertible truth that there is a marked rise in individuals suffering from insufficient quality sleep. Due to the dearth of sleep, there are a plethora of ailments emerging. In this essay, I will analyze the principal detrimental effects of sleep deprivation and propose viable remedies to counteract this problem.
Sleep deprivation gravely impairs overall well-being, thereby leading to several health issues in an individual. It induces fatigue and undermines cognitive functions like memory, concentration, and decision-making which hamper productivity in various settings, and makes people prone to personal risks and organizational performance. Besides, chronic lack of sleep disrupts hormonal balance, heightens stress hormones, and exacerbates the risk of serious health conditions such as obesity, hypertension, and cardiovascular diseases. Additionally, people staying active on social media late at night often encounter disrupted sleep patterns which contribute to headaches, dizziness, etc.
To address the challenges encompassing sleep deprivation, governments should act responsibly in enforcing stringent adherence to working hour regulations so that it enables employees to better manage their workloads. To maintain a rigorous sleep schedule, individuals should also curtail exposure to screens and social media during evening hours to facilitate timely sleep onset, and optimized body circadian rhythm. Doing regular exercises in a relaxed environment and sleeping in a tranquil setting are a few other remedies for optimal sleep. Even periodic awareness campaigns are necessary to elucidate the essentiality of sound and quality sleep.
In conclusion, the ramifications of sleep deprivation pose a significant threat to overall well-being. Hence, it is imperative to implement comprehensive measures such as fostering awareness of its detrimental effects, reducing engagement with electronic devices, and maintaining disciplined sleep routines. These strategies can assist in alleviating the impact of sleep deprivation and enabling a scenario for healthier sleep practices.
Conclusion
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